Originally posted in my LiveJournal on 17 February 2005.
After much development and several dead-ends, I bring you a soundtrack dedicated to my favorite couple (OTP for you fandom types), Jeassinae/Nijelyn--affectionately known as Jea/Neija:
- Shiver -- Coldplay
- Away From Me -- Evanescence
- Tower Of Learning -- Rufus Wainwright
- Bend And Not Break -- Dashboard Confessional
- Run -- Snow Patrol
- Everything -- Alanis Morissette
- Suffer In Silence -- The Frames
- The Shining -- Badly Drawn Boy
- Wherever You Will Go -- The Calling
- Indefinitely -- Travis
- I Grieve -- Peter Gabriel
- Cold Water -- Damien Rice
Jeassinae Kalisria and Nijelyn Vanuka are two of my original characters from the rather-large amount of fiction that I collectively refer to as Faerie. I have this tendency to refer to my different fantasy stories by the name of the land about which they're centered. Jeassinae and Nijelyn are by no means central characters to my main Faerie story. Their lives take place--for the most part--thousands of years before the birth of Jeanne Lésane, the main character in the trilogy. Jeassinae started out as a slight mention in the first draft of the first Faerie novel (back when it was called Child of Faerie, Child of Earth, i.e. the Stone Age), and Nijelyn didn't appear at all. Then on some forgotten whim, I started trying to write some of the history of Faerie, starting with the Saints, who, at that point, consisted almost entirely of Saint Aderana, the first Queen of Faerie. Jeassinae had been mentioned as an advisor, and she started gaining a greater form as I began to draft things out. Nijelyn, by this point, had a mention as another minor Saint--one associated almost exclusively with music and nothing else. Somewhere along the line I began to actually write portions of Aderana's story, and, as I did, Jeassinae quickly came to the fore and stole the show, as it were.
Her role in Jeanne's story has grown enormously since then--such that she has grown inextricably bound to Jeanne's story, and, as that has happened, I've learned more and more about Jeassinae's own life. Jeassinae was always isolated from her siblings--the rest of the Saints, or T'jalear as they're called in Faerie--with the exception of her eldest sister, Aderana. Aderana essentially raised Jeassinae because she was abandoned by their mother, Carisae. At the tender age of eight winters, though, Jeassinae left her family and set out across the wilderness that Faerie was at that point. She became something of a warrior, a lonely figure whose sole concern was to keep Faerie safe for her brothers and sisters, and especially for Aderana. Until Nijelyn entered her life. And so Requited begins:
Shiver -- Coldplay Being quite anti-social, Jeassinae was incredulous, to say the least, when Nijelyn first confessed his love for her. Shiver always reminds me of Nijelyn's many attempts to get Jeassinae's attention. Ironically, it's finally through a ballad that he gets her attention.
Away From Me -- Evanescence Around the time Nijelyn confesses his love for Jeassinae, she's going through a very rough emotional period. Jeassinae struggles very often with her desires and what she sees as the world's expectations of her. Away From Me expresses both those frustrations, and her inner desire for someone to save her from that.
Tower Of Learning -- Rufus Wainwright Nijelyn was both driven and taken aback by his desire for Jeassinae, and I feel that expressed in Tower of Learning. Nijelyn was certainly searching for something, and he didn't expect to find it in Jeassinae.
Bend And Not Break -- Dashboard Confessional Jeassinae, as I mentioned before, is emotionally insecure, but she's one of those people who can pass herself off to others as being fine. Bend and Not Break shows her insecurity with Nijelyn. She can't hide her weaknesses from him, and, as time progresses, she trusts him more and more to soothe her fears.
Run -- Snow Patrol Run is a frequent choice for ship-related soundtracks, I know. But I find it particularly appropriate for Jeassinae and Nijelyn because of the us-against-the-world attitude and the sheer rush of love expressed in the lyrics. In drawing Jeassinae out of her shell somewhat, Nijelyn removes himself from the company of the rest of the T'jalear and takes some of Jeassinae's self-imposed isolation upon himself.
Everything -- Alanis Morissette Most simply put: How could Jeassinae not be grateful and somewhat amazed at Nijelyn's commitment to her? Everything was an obvious choice for me.
Suffer In Silence -- The Frames Suffer in Silence is the quintessential Jea/Neija song for me. It is the perfect representation of Nijelyn supporting Jeassinae. And, face it, you knew the Frames would be here somewhere.
The Shining -- Badly Drawn Boy There's been a progression through the soundtrack toward a maturer form of Jeassinae and Nijelyn's relationship, but this song was placed here as something of a reminder of Nijelyn's constant desire to improve Jeassinae's otherwise depressing life.
Wherever You Will Go -- The Calling Oh no, foreshadowing! Not only does this song reflect Nijelyn's commitment to Jeassinae, but it hints at the thing they both wonder: what would happen if they were separated? Jeassinae is, after all, a warrior.
Indefinitely -- Travis Despite her drive to continue protecting Aderana and the rest of her siblings at all costs, Jeassinae has to admit that she wants nothing more than to spend all her life at Nijelyn's side. (Hence that whole requited thing, yeah?)
I Grieve -- Peter Gabriel Fate has a reputation as a cruel mistress, and it's no different for Jeassinae and Nijelyn. At long last, Faerie's enemies manage to exact revenge on Jeassinae, leaving Nijelyn stunned and alone.
Cold Water -- Damien Rice Despite all appearances, though, Jeassinae is not dead. Her enemies have kidnapped and imprisoned her, though that won't be rightly discovered until Jeanne's time. In any case, Cold Water describes her feelings right after her kidnapping well. There's an additional reason I like the lyrics of this particular song, but I'll leave it to those more familiar with Jeassinae's story to guess at that ;-)